A throbbing pain in his neck
He feels a throbbing pain in his neck.This came from having a shouting match where he raised his voice more than is necessary. So much shouting and not enough listening. He wonders where the times have gone when his children would look at him with respect; or, was it merely frustration? It is hard to determine now. That there is a lot of acrimony and unresolved issues speaks of his failure as a father. He fears that his life has really taken a turn for the worse. This has never happened before although he had a hint of it once a few years ago when his two older sons exchanged words. He tried to intervene then and nothing much came out of his intervention. They did calm down after a while but was it due to his intervention? He thinks that he was not a factor then and he is certain that his influence has totally waned.
He wonders if this is the way that all fathers go when they grow weak and lose their ability to impose discipline. Is it strict discipline that is responsible for rebellious behavious? He is sure that he was never a strict disciplinarian. In fact, one could say he was the exact opposite of that term. He was laid back and easy going, preferring discussion and lectures to corporal punishment. He beilieved that corporal punishment is the lazy man's way of shutting down opposition. Now, he is not sure about anythng at all. He feels that he might have failed as a father. Surely, his lack of income is one cause of his decline as an authority figure. Who would listen to anyone who did not have any money to give? Who would come to him if he had nothing to give?
This is his life and he endures it without whining and rancor. He accepts it for what it is. There is nothing more to it and it is not really such a big deal. He wants to be clear to himself that he is aware of everything that is happening and he blames no one for his predicament. He takes it rather philosophically. He had lost the respect of his siblings years before and how he is seeing the gradual erosion of his children's respect for him. Should he be sad? Is this the way of all flesh?
He thinks that he is still lucky to have had sons. They have to live their lives and that is something that he could never do for them He has tried to teach them the lessons that he has learned in his life and it seems that it is the hardest thing to do. History repeats itself. He can feel and he can see his sons making the same mistakes that he made when he was younger, just like they are now. C'est la vie. That is the way the dice roll. He is still thankful for the time he has now. He has no more cause to regret anything. He has lived a difficult life and that is good enough for him, He doesn't really care to have a good life, a better life, a wonderful life. They are all the same to him.
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He wonders if this is the way that all fathers go when they grow weak and lose their ability to impose discipline. Is it strict discipline that is responsible for rebellious behavious? He is sure that he was never a strict disciplinarian. In fact, one could say he was the exact opposite of that term. He was laid back and easy going, preferring discussion and lectures to corporal punishment. He beilieved that corporal punishment is the lazy man's way of shutting down opposition. Now, he is not sure about anythng at all. He feels that he might have failed as a father. Surely, his lack of income is one cause of his decline as an authority figure. Who would listen to anyone who did not have any money to give? Who would come to him if he had nothing to give?
This is his life and he endures it without whining and rancor. He accepts it for what it is. There is nothing more to it and it is not really such a big deal. He wants to be clear to himself that he is aware of everything that is happening and he blames no one for his predicament. He takes it rather philosophically. He had lost the respect of his siblings years before and how he is seeing the gradual erosion of his children's respect for him. Should he be sad? Is this the way of all flesh?
He thinks that he is still lucky to have had sons. They have to live their lives and that is something that he could never do for them He has tried to teach them the lessons that he has learned in his life and it seems that it is the hardest thing to do. History repeats itself. He can feel and he can see his sons making the same mistakes that he made when he was younger, just like they are now. C'est la vie. That is the way the dice roll. He is still thankful for the time he has now. He has no more cause to regret anything. He has lived a difficult life and that is good enough for him, He doesn't really care to have a good life, a better life, a wonderful life. They are all the same to him.
Cool blogs basking in the blog park. Visit these pages:
posted by webnight at
7:59 AM
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